Hearts & Minds: The Diplomatic dodgeball triggered by Trump victory

Across the world, politicians are rowing back. Prior to the US election, they made disobliging remarks about Donald Trump, many of them personal, on the assumption that the American people would never return him to the White House. Now, they’re desperately trying to unpick what they said.

It’s a very human dilemma, to be caught saying something that you later regret. In their cases they thought it was smart at the time and often, their comments were calculated to be audience-pleasing. It’s not just the political class that can be trapped in this way: CEOs and business leaders are frequently asked for a view about a rival or politician, only to find that person later becomes a partner or key ally. Suddenly, they wish to be besties with someone they were most rude about. Oh dear.

There’s an art to this type of reverse turn. It’s a hard pill to swallow but it you want to repair the damage you must admit you were wrong, plain and simple. You made a mistake; you now realise your judgment was awry. That’s it. If you said it in public, you must say so again in public.

Nothing else will do. Too many apologies of this nature are half-hearted and insincere, beginning with the tell-tale ‘if’ as in ‘if I said those things I regret them’ or ‘if I caused hurt, I apologise. You did, don’t pretend there is any doubt - that simply won’t wash.

Neither is it acceptable, as one senior Labour figure is attempting at the moment in regard to Trump, to maintain those things you said, that was a long time ago, ‘it’s all in the past’. Whoa. Not only do people have memories but so does their circle; you said it and they have not forgotten. Also, it’s on social media, online, it can’t be erased, it’s easily found and repeated as if you said it only yesterday.

It’s a mistake to presume your sorrow is enough and automatically believe you can immediately get on like a house on fire. Saying ‘I apologise and I look forward to us working together’ sends the wrong signal. It appears transactional: ‘I am only saying this because I have to, because my eye is on a big prize’. No. You must let the person you insulted have their moment; they have to be allowed to come back to you in their own time, of their own choosing. They will not relish being pushed.

Good luck. It might be needed.

Chris Blackhurst is one of the UK’s foremost business journalists. He was previously Editor of The Independent and City Editor of the Evening Standard.